Why you can't finish your tracks?

Or, why I couldn't finish my tracks...

It is I feel, harder these days to work on creative projects in your spare time, as most of us do our art when we’re not working for the man. But do we even have spare time anymore?

I was quite aware of the impact Facebook would inflict on me when it came out, as I already struggled to find ‘my time’ to make music. See my job was 7.30am to 6pm Monday to Friday plus most Saturday mornings. We had just had our first child and moved into a one and a bit bedroom size house, and it was too small to have a music studio. Ok, I lie. Before my son had a very little room of his own, it was my small studio room for just over a year. And I must say I was very productive in it. Giving up creative space is a tragedy for an artist and for too long I struggled to find my flow again.

See the plan was to move to a bigger house after a couple of years but unfortunately for us there was a crash looming in 2008, and by the end of 2009 the value of our home had dropped 25%. So we were stuck there, expecting another child and I lost my job. I didn’t realise it at the time but depression had taken hold of me and I’d lost my forward vision. I felt like a failure and became worried about what others would think of me. So trying to stay positive I decided to learn web design as I thought there was a better future in that.

All I really wanted to do though was music. But I was scared no one in my family or any of my friends would take me seriously. I felt they had to see me doing something that made sense to them, rather than pursue something that made sense to me. It was a very frustrating time and not having a space to hide myself away to create something was eating into me. Of course I was putting the family first, making sure we had enough to keep warm, clothed and fed but I really didn’t know what to do with myself.

Avoiding social media

All through this time I completely avoided social media. I never signed up for Facebook in spite of the constant insistence. I did post some music on soundcloud but that was it. I was a ghost in the online world and became kind of proud of it. Of course I knew it would take time away from me doing creative work. It is a distraction. Or that’s how I reasoned my hiding.

I was kind of right though because still, the problem with the internet is, if social media doesn’t hook you in, something else will. There are blogs about how to earn loads of money and how to be a better you. Great new music machines that you will want, once you know about them. New VST’s to make your DAW sound old. Old synths and drum machines you need in your life and millions of Youtube videos showing you all this stuff. Plus, it’s very easy to spend the rest of the night looking up random stuff after just one search for something you wanted an answer to. For example, “How do I mix in Headphones?”.

There is an answer and a product for everything, so the real question should be how disciplined are you? Because if you struggle with getting a hold of yourself and focusing on a project completely, you are going to struggle in this modern, supposedly, connected world. Just how much discipline do you need to deal with all this stuff? … A lot! But as I have found out, the answer to dealing with this quandary is actually really easy.

Just do it!

I think Nike nailed it with this one. I sometimes wonder if Nike wearers are actually more successful than Adidas wearers due to that tag line. It’s a good one and one I’m convinced is better than any self help book. As someone who’s read a few and listened to a bit of Tony what’s his name in my most depressed days, I can tell you that’s pretty much what all them books tell you in the end. But If you’re still not sure what their message is, give them all of your money, buy the course and sign up for life! Ffs.

It’s true though. You have to, just do it. Experience will teach you more than several videos all about slightly varied versions of the same topic. You are better watching one, taking some notes, then trying stuff out. Or actually pausing and trying out stuff as you watch.

This is because actually doing a thing makes it real. It makes you go “Oh that doesn’t quite work the same with my set up. So what do I need to do based on what the Tuber just said to get it working here, hmm?”. When this happens you’re thinking for yourself and problem solving. The more you do this the more you will learn how to do these things in different ways in various circumstances.

This is how you actually learn. Just watching is addictive and causes you to make excuses to yourself like ‘I need to know this stuff so I’ll watch another’. Before long, your evening is over and you’re suddenly aware of how late it is and that you have to get up for work. And that’s depressing!

How do I manage myself

As someone who would probably be diagnosed with something to do with a lack of concentration, I do struggle to manage myself. I’m constantly getting new ideas. I’m curious about loads of subjects and buy more books than I can read at once. I want to run this site, make new music, finish old projects, make new products, learn new drum machines, write blog posts, read books, exercise, do stuff with the kids. I gotta work. I tend to fix my own machines, car and house and I like to watch TV and like a lie in on the weekend. I need an extra 5 days in a week tbh. But in spite of all these things I do, and want to do, I still find myself stuck in Ebay and watching Youtube videos. The internet has ruined my life!

Or has it? When I think back to my teenage and early twenties was I more organised and productive? Hmm, gotta be honest here. No, no I was not. I had a job to keep me in check and so lived within a daily routine. But in my own time there were friends to drink and smoke with, girlfriends to spend time with and new music to keep up with. Also, there were chores, TV and magazines to keep me occupied. Sounds idilic in hindsight.

I didn’t have much to write music on in the year 2000 AD. For about £350, I managed to obtain a Yamaha QY70, a Keyfax Phatboy and a Roland PC-180. There was no audio recording, so any vocal ideas went straight to cassette in my hifi mixed with the music. The only way I had to keep myself organised was lined paper pads for lyrics and ideas, and sheets of graph paper for working out arrangements and structure. For information about chords and scales I had a Music Theory book and a ‘How to play Keyboards’ book. That was it. No Youtube, no Blogs, no Amazon and no library near by.

Sounds even more idilic now but it honestly didn’t seem like that at the time. It felt secluded. And I knew no one else near by who wanted to do what I wanted to do, which was to make electronic music. Plenty of DJs though, sheesh!

On that last note about being solo in my creative endeavours I will say that having someone work with you, if you are both pretty determined, will help you stay focused and productive as you both will have a responsibility to each other. It may also provide more options with equipment as you will be able to pool your resources. What doesn’t work for them may be just what you needed and vice versa.

For me though it was my homemade workbooks and planners I sketched out on to the pages of my plain, lined and graph pads. It was the best way I had to spill my ideas out and see them take shape, when I was having a more productive day that is.

Revelation

In 2011, remembering how I used to manage my work pre-DAW, is what pulled me out of the depression I was in. So I started designing new grid paper sheets and began working on a new kind of Music Theory book. I didn’t really think about selling them. I just thought of it as finding a way to help me get back into making music again. I would have something to try out to see if it helped with my creative blocks.

This thought process makes me realise what I said about self help. You just gotta do it. See, it doesn’t matter about your situation. If you want to create because you are that way inclined you just need to do it. Because if you don’t, you will be missing something in your life and will become depressed. If you need to resort to headphones to make music, don’t read all the conflicting opinions online, just do it, and try to learn the adjustments needed to make that work.

Your kit is what you have and if you have any type of sampler built into your DAW or groove box you can make whatever music you want. Honestly, I knew this back when I only had the QY70 to make sounds. I really wanted an MPC2000 at the time, but by the time I saved enough to get one I bought a Laptop and Ableton Live.

Again, in hindsight, due to how I worked at the time and the ideas I had, buying a cheap sampler sooner (pre house and baby), probably would have made more sense for me. But after, I did gain a self contained studio with lots of audio tracks, samplers, synths and effects, so you have to weigh it up.

In the end, it’s not the kit, it’s the ideas you have and all the computer power in the world cannot articulate what they may be. You have to take control, first of yourself, then of the idea. You have to switch off pesky distractions. Then take your idea and mould it to express your conceptual experience of this weird and wonderful magical mystery tour that we all find ourselves on. And do it with all the power you have available to you. Only when you have done this can you truly move on to the next stage.

Tags - Useful / Tips